Wendi: [00:00:00] Welcome to Beyond the Military Podcast, a space for military women determined to focus on life outside of the military. As a fellow woman veteran who once felt lost after leaving the military, I know firsthand the challenges that we face. Hi, my name is Wendi Wray, a woman of God, wife, mom of three, army veteran.

Life and career coach, and I’m on a mission to equip and empower women like yourself to excel in life and career with confidence. In this podcast, you’ll walk away with a tool that will help you navigate your career and life mentally and emotionally during and beyond your service. So if you’re ready to go from stuck to confident, this podcast is for you.

Loosen up your laces and grab a coffee because it’s time to step up. Into a new chapter with clarity and confidence.

/Hello and welcome to episode 245. I am [00:01:00] so excited that you are tuning in today. And if you’ve been tuning in for the last 244 episodes, I just want to say thank you so much for coming back and tuning into another episode. And if you stumbled upon this podcast, I want to welcome you. And also just hope that you get the most out of this episode. And listen, you all, if you haven’t given me a review, I want to ask you for a huge favor today.

And that is for you to scroll down to the very bottom of the podcast platform that you are tuning in from, and leave me a review. Let me know what you’re enjoying. Let me know what you want to hear more about or even just let me know what you are possibly wanting more of as well. So any feedback on there is greatly appreciated. Not only to continue to provide more content for you, but also to be able to reach more women that are transitioning out of the military, or even just wanting to, feel encouraged about their life, their career, their emotional well being, just [00:02:00] being a leader in the military or even in the civilian sector.

So today’s focus is going to be about setting a goal. Based on where you are in your military transition into the civilian sector. And that could be either you looking for a job opportunity. It could mean you go into school. It can mean juice, simply just getting out and figuring out what you’re going to do when you get out of the military, if you’re not even there yet.

So whatever it may be, I hope that you use this or find it useful. Whatever that may look like for you. My hopes is that you use this as a way for you to set a goal for the next 30 days., because it’s going to help you at the very beginning of next year, because what’s happening now.

If you are applying for opportunities, you may or may not get a call. During this time but for sure you may be getting looked at early next year. And so [00:03:00] I want to provide you an idea of what you could be focused on for the next 30 days. And that is just simply creating a goal on what you’re going to hone in on because this will allow you to not only get better at that one thing, but also possibly even get ahead for when that time does come.

Right. Because here’s what happens with our brain when. We are in the holiday season or as we are approaching. The the, the end of the year, for some reason, our mind wants to go and like autopilot. And we just want to relax and just not worry about our transition or not worry about this new job, not worry about the school that I’m going to be going to, or just the military transition in general.

Right? Maybe your VA appointments maybe when you’re doing your left seat, right seat, your transition out of that role. So I want to shed some light on yes. It is time for you to also have [00:04:00] fun with the family, spend time decorating, spend time, whatever you typically do on the holidays and that could be like visiting family, traveling and everything else.

But I also want you to keep this goal that you are going to set for yourself for the next 30 days. To be focused on still making progress and wherever you are, because again, our mind wants to say no Wendi. Let’s not focus on writing the essay or thinking about what schools we’re going to, you know, go after we get out or apply to let’s just focus on what’s going to feel good.

And that’s eating all the holiday desserts, drinking, all the caffeine, all the holiday drinks. Or just, you know, escaping from what needs to be done. . So again, I’m, not saying that you shouldn’t have fun or enjoy the holiday season. What I’m saying here is to stay focused on what’s going to help you to make progress. And also to continue to be alongside with your timeline in where you want to go. Right. And [00:05:00] that could be again into a civilian role it could be into your education. It could just be with, you know, your family. And so I just want to give you an example. To help you. Stay encouraged and also to help you continue to guide your mind. When you are feeling like, okay, no, no one’s hiring right now. No, one’s going to interview me.

So I’m just going to like, put that all away and then reconvene in January. And so when January comes, you’re like starting all over and you have to get your mind back into it. And that sometimes can not be the best option for us, especially if you already have like a thousand things going on. So again, I want you to think about it as if you are getting ready to run 10 miles. And if you’re like, okay, I’m just not going to run at all until January, but I have to run mid January. And now you’ve taken a whole, almost 60 days. You know, break you’ve been on the couch.

You’ve been eating, you’ve been, doing everything but working out or getting ready for that run. And now you are [00:06:00] expecting your body to just go running at the time that you were running before, when obviously that may or may not happen, because now your body’s going to have to. Not only get back into that groove,

it’s not realistic. So very similar with writing a resume or preparing for an interview or writing that up location for the schools or, you know, preparing for, you to spend time with the family, you know, intentionally whatever that may look like for you, or maybe, you know, planning that wedding or. Whatever that looks like for you.

And so I want to encourage you today. To set one goal. On what you’re going to do. So, for example, if you are transitioning into the cyclical sector, like February, March timeframe, And you’re like, okay, well, there are no events happening. Or I don’t want to write a resume because I’m not going to apply until January anyways. You’re just going to pause everything and put everything on hold. Then I recommend that you one not do that, but [00:07:00] to focusing on the hardest thing that you don’t want to do. So if it’s the resume, I want you to focus on the resume for the next 30 days. And that could mean, it could, you could start by looking at what that job description is, right.

Like looking at to dissecting. Okay.

Based on this job description, what can I pull? What skills, what competencies, what qualifications are required for me to ensure that are on my resume. So then you can, you know, start looking at that. And again, It doesn’t have to be all in one day. You can break that down, break that into a week. Then the next week.

Okay. Now I’m going to apply. The actual bullets to this resume. If you’re in the interview phase, or like, let’s say, they’re like, okay, now, you know, we’ve scheduled an interview for sometime in December. Okay. Great. How can you prepare now for this interview? Right. You’re going to take the X amount of days that you need. To prepare that could be, you know, asking your spouse to help you prepare a friend., another leader, someone that you can trust that with [00:08:00] that. Is going to give you. Actual real feedback. And not sugar coat, anything. And so again, depending on where you are, So, if you are in a phase where you’re, you know, you’re getting out the end of this year or early next year, and you are going to start school, let’s just say beginning of next year, what can you do to prepare for that?

Again? You don’t have to have a detailed plan. But just getting, situated, maybe with a platform that there’ll be using right. For, the courses or the tools that you’ll be using, getting more in the know of that. You’re planning your wedding or you’re planning something significant that’s happening early in the year. Maybe you’re having a baby.

Like how can you prepare these things during the holiday madness during the holiday season? And continue to make progress and do things in a way where, you know, you’re going to be making progress. So, what I want you to do today and encourage you to do is [00:09:00] of course, if you’re not driving or doing anything else, if you are pause episode and come back to, to this. Because I want you to just do or write out two things, write out exactly what you’re going to focus on the next 30 days.

So you could say something as simple as I will focus on, refining my resume for 10 job descriptions. And I’ll do it by this date. So I’ll do it by November, by December 15th. Let’s just say. So then when you do that one, you are taking it serious that you’re going to mainly focus on this one thing. You’re not going to focus on interview prep.

You’re not going to focus on creating stories for, you know, These bullet points. You’re primarily only going to focus on refining your resume for these 10 roles. And again, I’m just giving an example. It could be three roles for you. It going to be 20 rolls, whatever it may be. When you do that, you’re. You’re telling yourself, [00:10:00] and you’re reminding yourself of what you’re going to do.

And then you’re going to give yourself a timeframe. And listen, you all were military. We, we literally. Do everything by a timeline. By any hard time that we are given. And so I want you to use this. As a way to remind yourself that what needs to be done for you as you’re getting out during a holiday season during a time that it’s a very busy., time for family and can also be. You know, emotionally draining, because as some of you may know, I have lost my sister now for two years.

And it’s, it’s been hard during the holidays to say the least. And it’s not something that, yes, I am happy about. I’m excited, but it’s still something that I have to deal with. And I have to be aware. About when those emotions do come up. And so I want to encourage you, regardless of what the holidays mean to you. Regardless of, you know, what comes [00:11:00] up for you during this time? I want you to use a safe, focused, to stay focused, to stay prepared, to stay ahead of the game. And to continue to make progress. This is honestly the reason why. And one of the reasons why I wanted to share this with you all is because last year I had to do this for me intentionally, because I still had a one-year-old, and I think, yes, she had just turned one.

And then on top of that, I had, you know, all these negative emotions come up about. You know, it’s just, it’s, it’s a great time, but it’s still a time where a little bit of sadness creeps in and at the same time, You know, gratitude comes in, right. And so doing something that’s going to help you to stay on task, to help you stay focused. And to help you make progress because here’s the truth.

You all, it’s literally 45 days. That we sometimes take for granted and we sometimes kind of say, well, we’re done with the year. Bye. Like November 27th when the year they’re [00:12:00] still more days more time to the year. And so I want to encourage you to finish strong. I want to encourage you to keep doing what needs to be done in order for you to be. You know, at that as successful as possible. In that next phase of your life either is your military transition either it’s in preparation for another. You know, phase of your life. I want you to say encourage, but we have to do this by being intentional about what we’re thinking.

What’s coming up, guiding our mind with. Okay. We don’t want to do it. You have to put up the Christmas tree or we’re gonna, you know, go holiday shopping or we have to beat, you know, the black Friday deals. But we also need to be considering. What really matters here, right? Like, what’s that next phase still continuing to focus on that. And not just throw it all away. And then expect to run the 10 miles. You know, January when you haven’t done any running for the last 45 days.

So again, I hope that this is [00:13:00] useful. I hope that you use this quick little two-minute activity again, write down exactly what you’re going to focus on for the next 30 days or whatever amount of days. Exactly what you’re going to do. Write your deadline and then come back and see exactly where do you need to be so that you know exactly what you’re going to be doing, what you’re going to focus on. And what happens to during that time, you’ll see different things.

You’re going to be like, okay, now that I’m only focusing on one thing and this one thing only. During my military transition into the civilian sector. Then I can be completely honest about not wanting to enter this role or not wanting to pursue this, specific role because it requires the skills and I don’t have them, or I don’t have that much experience in them, but I also,, I’m not aligned with this career growth career path for this specific role.

So again, I hope that, this is useful. Let me know through a review or just send me a direct message on LinkedIn. [00:14:00] If you have not connected with me on LinkedIn, I want to invite you to come connect with me. Because I will also be sharing on LinkedIn. My event. There’ll be hosting early December. All right.

Well, you have a great rest of your week. Talk to you soon. Bye.

Hey lady, if this podcast helped you, challenged you or inspired you in some way, please leave me a written review for the show on Apple Podcasts and share it with another military sister. Please join us in the military women community on Facebook at bit.

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