[00:00:00] Wendi: Hey sis, welcome to Beyond the Military Podcast, where faith led military women overcome burnout and create more balance. Just imagine having enough time to focus on your faith, family, and have more fun while still serving as a woman leader. In this podcast, you will walk away with the tools to help you navigate the busy life of a military woman, organize your mind, overcome overwhelm, create a prioritization playbook, and a balanced blueprint for integrating faith, family, and career.

[00:00:28] Wendi: Yeses in that order. Hi, I’m Wendi Wray woman of God, wife, mama of two, army veteran, and certified life coach. And I’m here to help you create a life of meaning outside of the military, a life of laughter, joy, and intentional free time. If you are ready to overcome burnout and create balance as a faith led military woman, sis, this podcast is for you.

[00:00:50] Wendi: So loosen up your laces and grab your coffee because it’s time to step into freedom and peace.

[00:00:55] Wendi: Hello ladies and welcome to episode 219. I am [00:01:00] super excited that you’re here today and I’m very excited about today’s topic. Before we go there. I want to invite you to come connect with me on LinkedIn. I socialize come network with me. Tell me that you’re listening to this episode, share with me the topics that you would love to listen to more on this platform. And the reason I want to invite you to come connect with me on LinkedIn is because I am going to be going live. And every single week, starting May 20th. On Monday. I will be presenting new topics that are frequently asked questions.

[00:01:32] Wendi: I’ll be covering topics where I see some of my clients struggling. I will be live for at least 20 minutes to not only get to her. We’re about your transition. What also to help you. So go connect with me. And you can search me under Wendi W E N D I and then my last name is W R A Y. All right. I look forward to connecting with you. And today’s topic I want to emphasize [00:02:00] the importance about the location type.

[00:02:04] Wendi: This is so important and let me tell you why this is important because you want to set the tone with the jobs, the roles. the actual career that you are pursuing from the very beginning. I want you to start with location type because you then get to start searching for the roles within that type of location. And by that, I mean, is it going to be a hybrid? Is it going to be an onsite? Or is it going to be a fully remote role now for the most part? We are always considering on-site because that’s what we know.

[00:02:42] Wendi: That’s what we’re accustomed to. But at the same time, As dual military as women that are moms that are probably even considering starting a family, we then panic or we freeze. Because we’re like, well, the whole point [00:03:00] of me getting out is to get that work-life balance to start a family, to, um, be able to have more autonomy with my time. But here’s the thing you want to have more flexibility.

[00:03:11] Wendi: I get that. But also considering. Maybe even her morals or maybe hybrid rules, right. And let’s just say that you are a military spouse as well. Maybe you’re getting out. We are also following your husband based on whatever location he will be. Then. Um, PCs and two or moving to. And that’s completely okay.

[00:03:34] Wendi: And this is why I encourage. Uh, my clients and even just women in general that are getting out of the military because listen, ladies, I get it. It’s hard, especially if you have little ones, especially if you were thinking of. I don’t know where to the family. Especially, if you want to have more flexibility, maybe you want to also do school. Remote opportunities is the best [00:04:00] opportunity for someone that wants to pursue. Uh, to continue to have a family, to maybe start a relationship. Maybe just be at home to support the husband.

[00:04:10] Wendi: Now this isn’t to say that, oh, you shouldn’t, you know, not have a job or a career. Of course, if that’s something that you’ve already communicated. With your husband with your significant other. This is something to just consider. I’m just offering it for you to have an open mind if you were on the fence or if you’re feeling stuck. And also if you’re someone that maybe has no idea of what the remote opportunities look like, or how many opportunities are there, they are. What specific girls are there remote opportunities for your field, for the industry that you want to go into? And the question. Allows you to do some research, right?

[00:04:51] Wendi: It allows you to deeper into that. But this is why I want to offer this to you. And there’s nothing wrong with hybrid. There’s nothing wrong with onsite. But [00:05:00] that’s what I want to share with you today. I want to share with you. Really what the different things are, the challenges, the pros and the cons. Because it’s so important for you to understand from the very beginning. You do not. I want to go and start searching for project management. And get all these types on site. It’s hybrid. Um, remote, but then you come to find out because you are a military spouse because you’re starting a family.

[00:05:27] Wendi: Now you have to relocate. And maybe the city or the location that you were pursuing eight months ago. It has not changed now that you’re 90 days out. And listen, if you are 90 days out, I don’t want you to panic and think that all the work that you’ve done. How does, you know, kind of gone down the drain or hasn’t been useful? No it has, and I encourage you. To focus really on. Location to type you want to focus on or do you want to pursue, because it’s so important with your career search. [00:06:00] And before I go any deeper onto how you can also update on. And within profile or how you can start to look for on, um, different platforms that allow you to see actual open jobs.

[00:06:12] Wendi: I want to first go over what the remote, what the hybrid and what the onsite looked like, the pros and the cons. So I want to start with the one that I would recommend if there’s one that I recommend to any military woman, to any mom, to any. military spouse, would it be fully remote? That’s just when one, that’s how I started, but here’s the thing with everything.

[00:06:36] Wendi: There are pros and there are comments, right. And it’s all based on what’s best for you and your family. So I encourage you. To focus on what’s best for you and your family. Meaning if you have a husband, if you have a significant other. Someone that a loved one that you are sharing this journey with.

[00:06:55] Wendi: I want you to begin with having a conversation. Really having this conversation. [00:07:00] And identifying, what exactly do you want from this transition? Are you guys looking to have more time on your hands? Are you guys wanting. What is it? What is the coal from this relationship? So that when, you know, in set the tone with that, you can then pursue if it’s remote or if the type of result site, whatever it may be for you. Yeah, because here’s the thing.

[00:07:23] Wendi: You may also have a spouse that already transitioned, or maybe he’s just a civilian. And possibly he works remotely already. Maybe you don’t want to have two individuals under the same roof working from home. It may not work out for you. So again, understanding. But the goal is for you and your family. So when you have that, then you then decide. Which one to pick again, remote hybrid. Or onsite, but I’m going to go with remote. As my top priority.

[00:07:54] Wendi: And I’m going to tell you why no, and also sharing my journey on. The [00:08:00] challenges that I faced, and I want you to also go to LinkedIn and I will drop all the links here in the show notes so that you go, you can go check out the short videos that I did talking about this topic, because I think it’s very important that we understand what are the challenges and also what are the advantages and what really is best for you because not everyone’s going to have the exact same goal. The exact same desires for their future career. The relationship very important, right? We want to make sure that our mental health or emotional will be is up the part in order for us to continue to keep going in order for us to keep leading, to continue. Yeah, keep being ourselves. And so. The advantages of funeral mope.

[00:08:44] Wendi: Obviously you have. Well flexibility. You have flexibility to reschedule. You have flexibility to learn behind the scenes. Um, do the work learn, do whatever you need to do. Go to. Equipment’s take your kids to school, drop them off, come back, do some [00:09:00] work, go to the meetings that you need to attend. Um, also be able to maybe have some flexibility with the types of meetings that you’re having, right?

[00:09:08] Wendi: Like maybe there are certain days that you are focusing only on getting things done. Maybe you don’t have meetings. On Tuesdays. And now you only have meetings all the other days. So we’re going, the flexibility is amazing. For the downfall, the biggest challenge is solitude and as you may know, When you were alone, all these thoughts come up and if you didn’t know that that’s okay. This is why I love sharing on this podcast.

[00:09:33] Wendi: You continue to learn one how our mind works. How our emotions are all obviously triggered.

[00:09:38] Wendi: I want to offer you to consider. What that would look like if you’re working remotely. What will that look like?

[00:09:38] Wendi: Thoughts are gonna come up. Emotions are going to come up. And if you don’t know, want you to just consider it one day. Pretend. And do kind of like a role play. What would I be doing?

[00:09:38] Wendi: When I’m at home. Next off with my computer in.

[00:09:38] Wendi: Um, negative emotion. Maybe even negative emotion.

[00:09:38] Wendi: So, what does that look like? And let’s just say it’s an event or it’s a circumstance. I want you to take a moment to brainstorm.

[00:09:38] Wendi: And really asking yourself, do

[00:09:38] Wendi: I need to explore more on how I’m dealing with this negative event? Negative circumstance. What are the circumstances?

[00:09:38] Wendi: There.

[00:09:38] Wendi: Remote opportunities is what I recommend, but of course there are advantages and disadvantages. There are pros and cons to everything. So with remote, I want to offer you. That you will have the flexibility. You will have full autonomy under schedule. For the most part, of course, you get to decide. Yeah.

[00:09:38] Wendi: The time frame based on what it’s Verde provided to you by your employer. But of course you are able to still drop off the kids. You’re able to still have meetings from the comfort of your home. Where you don’t have to plan for. Any travel time for, um, any other chocolates. And when you have appointments that need to be taken care. If you have kids, or if you’re planning on having kids or anything of that stuff work. So that is the beauty of having full flexibility of your normal. Now the downfall.

[00:09:38] Wendi: And I want to share with you kind of my story, my challenges. For me, it was not only new indifferent back in 2017. Also, it was something that really created or brought back a lot of the other emotions that hadn’t dealt with. And so just me. Working alone. Be a person that loves interacting with other [00:10:00] humans. A person that loves connecting that feeds energy from other human beings. I struggled because it was new 2017.

[00:10:10] Wendi: You really didn’t even hear about. But also I felt alone in a way where I wasn’t learning. I wasn’t learning or hadn’t been disciplined. To even ask them for help, because I thought I could do it all by myself. And so for you, what does that look like? You too. Focus on. Playing this out one day. How, what would that look like?

[00:10:33] Wendi: Do I have space? And if I don’t want to, what I create the space for you to work remotely and then what would come up for you? What would come up for me? Like ask yourself that question. Is there a situation or a circumstance that I haven’t dealt with. Maybe. You can have emotions that might come from it. I want you to go over this and also have this conversation with someone in your home, right?

[00:10:56] Wendi: Someone that it may have been. And [00:11:00] so in order for you to. Really start. Understanding what that will look like. I want you to role play it. I want you to do. Go to that part of your home, where you would work. Except at the workstation set up your computer. Whatever you need to set up and just sit there and ask yourself, okay.

[00:11:18] Wendi: I will take care of tasks. But what will I do when these emotions come up? When these thoughts come on? Cause that’s what happens. Our brain. We’ll give us all these thoughts that go on. All those negative emotions. Especially if we haven’t dealt with it and there’s nothing wrong with it, nothing’s gone wrong.

[00:11:36] Wendi: We. We are human. This happens on a day-to-day basis. Hi. It’s less and less. If you are in. In person or on. Because you have other humans as a distraction, you have other things that are able to distract you. You know, in the area, the pressure. People are watching you actually work. So many factors at play that again. Those thoughts won’t [00:12:00] really affect you because of the distractions. And so again, being able to look at both. You know, you have the flexibility.

[00:12:07] Wendi: We also have the challenges and, you know, that was just one of the challenges. I encountered not let alone, not being able to physically see other notes and actually. Communicate with them. Um, but yeah. The other thing that I struggled with was being organized. I was organized, which I was when.

[00:12:28] Wendi: the Officer. But then when it came to having everything just in my computer, I struggled, but thanks to that, I was. able to have build different systems. And now I use productivity tools like monday.com ClickUp. Trello all these other tools that are available to you to help you stay organized. And that’s just, again, some of the challenges that you’ll face in the skills that you’re going to have to. Build on and get better, better at. The other job location type is Hybrid . [00:13:00] This one is also one of my favorites, especially if you know exactly where you’re going, you know exactly where you’re relocating and now all you’re doing is looking up. At opportunities in that area. So, if you do have the opportunity to go in and interact, you are able to do so by going in, interacting with other humans. Getting your job done. Learning even more at the same time, you also get a little bit of the remote life, right?

[00:13:28] Wendi: So you may be going in once a week, three times a week. It really just depends on your employer. But you have now the flexibility of maybe just saying appointments for the times. That you are working from home and then you don’t have to worry about it when you’re going on site. And now you’re getting also. Well, you know, socialization that you need, maybe the energy that you need interacting with others, you know, asking for help in person.

[00:13:54] Wendi: Maybe you’re getting more work done if that’s how you work better. Right? More people work better in [00:14:00] environments where there are other people around them and that’s completely fine, but there are also people that work a lot better in a remote space. Where did they ever lock? So again, Hybrid, you get the, a little bit of both worlds and you get to experience it. But again, it’s only if you know exactly where you’re going and you know, that that city, that area has plenty of opportunities and also opportunity for you to grow up. All right.

[00:14:27] Wendi: So the next one. It’s almost like in this one, of course, it’s a typical going to work. You go in every day and you don’t really work remotely as much because most of the time that job will require your presence and that’s completely okay. But I want you to still understand that you will have some flexibility, right?

[00:14:47] Wendi: You may need to take a day off. You may need to take, you know, some time off. If you haven’t accepted appointments, it really just depends on your employer. But I want you to keep an open mind. If again, you already [00:15:00] know where you’re going and that location has said. So there’s pros and cons to all of these three, but I want you to really ask yourself and be honest with yourself and be honest with your family. Which ones would work best for everyone, which one of these would work for you within the next few years?

[00:15:18] Wendi: Because here’s another challenge that I have seen. Women are also just taking on whatever first opportunity to get nothing wrong with that. But here’s the downfall in the next six months, you’re going to be looking for another opportunity again. So you’re pretty much going to be starting all over. And then you have to prepare for the interview and explain why you were only there for six months. And it really doesn’t look well on paper because they you’re giving them, you know, more of an opportunity to think that you weren’t the right fit.

[00:15:51] Wendi: That could have been it right. Maybe you weren’t supposed to start working remotely because you knew that that wasn’t gonna be the best for you because you can’t get stuff done when you’re a mom. [00:16:00] Or it was fully on site. And you knew that you had other obligations like taking care of your kids, maybe your husband’s deployed, maybe, um, your husband travels a lot for work, whatever it may be.

[00:16:11] Wendi: And now you’re having to start from scratch. And on top of that, talk about it during the interview. Now they may not ask you, they may or may not, but you want to still bring it up so that it doesn’t seem as if you didn’t know what you were doing or, um, you don’t have the emotional intelligence to say, Hey, listen. I messed up at the very beginning.

[00:16:31] Wendi: I thought I knew what I wanted it. Just for transparency. It didn’t work for my family. And that’s also another way that you could do that. But again, I’d want to often to begin here, set the tone here, especially if you are six months out, 90 days out. I want you to get really clear with what job type to look for. Now, when it comes to looking for roles, you want to also. Be able to create that filter, right?

[00:16:57] Wendi: Don’t look at opportunities, all the [00:17:00] opportunities. If you know, you’re only going to be available for a moat, because then what happens? You find something that’s hybrid or onsite, and now you weren’t able to fully commit to that opportunity. Now you’ve did a resume. You’ve applied, but now that at the interview and you’re like, well, I actually can only work them up. You’re wasting your time and wasted their time.

[00:17:17] Wendi: It’s not a good luck. So again, I encourage you to start there so that you can then filter those jobs because there are so many jobs. In the way you do it on LinkedIn. I have done a video on LinkedIn to show you the step-by-step on how you can start doing that because here’s the thing. Another huge component of this is that you want to be also found our recruiters. You want to be found? But putting that on your LinkedIn profile, which by the way, if you didn’t know, you could do that.

[00:17:46] Wendi: Yes. You can go watch that video. It’s in the show notes. So that you can then add that to your profile and then recruiters can also find me. All right, ladies, this is all that I have for you today. But this was helpful. And listen, if you need help [00:18:00] and you need to revamp your profile, you need help with your resume and you need help with the interview process.

[00:18:06] Wendi: Send me a direct message on LinkedIn, and I’m happy to help you

[00:18:09] Wendi: Hey lady, if this podcast helped you, challenged you or inspired you in some way, please leave me a written review for the show on Apple Podcasts and share it with another military sister. Helping you integrate balance, prioritization and growth in your relationship with God is my ultimate calling. I’m so blessed that you are here and please join us in the faith led military women community on Facebook at bit.ly / beyond the military GRP. Again, it is. Bitly beyond the military GRP. All right. Talk to you soon. Bye