Wendi: [00:00:00] Hello, and welcome to episode 230 today. We’re talking about pursuing your career with your personal interests and your values in mind. But before we do. So I want to say thank you for those of you that have subscribed to my newsletter over on LinkedIn. And if you haven’t done, so I want you to stop what you’re doing right now.

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So I encourage you to come subscribe, come learn along with me. All right with that, let’s talk about persona pursuing the number, sewing, pursuing our personal interests and our values because here’s one thing that I had to learn the hard way. I was neglecting my personal interest and my values.

And by that, what I mean is, what is it. Extremely value in this moment. And how could I continue? [00:02:00] To pursue that in my interests. How do I continue to pursue that? By keeping that in mind and not allowing, , location or salary or, all these other things that I, that I have to do in a certain way, which I want to invite you to not neglect that about you as a woman, you as a mom, you as a wife. Because it’s hard.

You all, it’s so easy to sometimes just say yes to a career based on what we’ve done in the military, based on what we are known for based on what we are doing now. And we, it distracts us from our personal, actual, personal interests and values. And here’s what I mean, I’m going to use my example and I’m also going to use other examples that I’ve. Not only experienced with my clients, but also other women that I’ve helped just by having this conversation. And that being for me as, at the time. I had no idea what I wanted to do.

I just knew I had to do something out of the military and I needed to start making money. And that was [00:03:00] just my number one goal. I did not pursue exactly what I wanted and instead I decided to just kind of wing it. Which at the end of the day, whatever we fall into, if you already transitioned. Or if you’re like, Hey, I already started my new job and it’s not something that I like.

I want to encourage you and allow you to decide right now that you’re going to make the most of it, that you’re going to gain all the skills that you may not even think you, you were going to, to gain or attain and to take. It as an opportunity, which I’m sure you’re doing already, but I just want to remind you and tell you that it’s okay.

If you haven’t done it correctly or the right way, I would say. That we sometimes think we need to do it. And so with that, for me, it was more of like, not knowing, right? No one asked me that question. Like, what really do you want to do? Or what exactly do you see yourself doing in the next five years?

And so for me, it was more of like the I’m just going to wing it and I’m going to go with whatever comes my way. And [00:04:00] thankfully I did have a great opportunity. I was a recruiter for a junior military officer, recruiting company, and that focus on veterans. But here’s the thing I did not understand fully what that meant for me in the next couple of years. Meaning that I didn’t understand the career growth for that, meaning that I didn’t understand how that was going to impact me in the next couple of years in my family.

And so again, this was before COVID, so this whole work at home thing was new to me, which I did take advantage of which again, I’m grateful for this opportunity. Because it provided me an opportunity to work from home even before COVID. And so again, super grateful, loved everything about it. I got to talk to other military service members.

I got to be involved in the SFL tap. I was able to see firsthand exactly what was happening within the Fort Bragg area now Fort Liberty. But what I missed out on. It was neglecting what I truly wanted and that was to [00:05:00] continue to yes be in HR. So that kind of fit well. But I also want to feed you something more.

It wasn’t just about HR. It was more of how can I use this as an opportunity to start here? But I also, in the back of my mind knew that I also wanted another child. And so we didn’t know exactly when that was going to happen. But at the same time, I didn’t ask myself those questions. And so today I want to invite you to ask yourself, , what exactly am I going to pursue? And why am I pursuing this? Right.

Isn’t aligning with my values. Is it aligning with where I am in my relationship? , maybe you’re single or maybe you want to start a family. , is this something that you truly value? Is this something that’s going to be at the very top, right? Because we value a lot of the things that obviously we’re considering right time. Salary our career paths, girls up with growth opportunities. [00:06:00] In our family. But how exactly are we putting them against the career opportunity?

Meaning are we valuing. Our family. Are we putting our family at the very top or is it okay that you’re not starting a family? You saw like three to five years to start a family and that’s completely okay. And now you’re able to focus a hundred percent, 110%. To work on site and be able to travel and be able to do all these other things that you weren’t going to be able to do, or that you could, to a certain extent when you do have a family, when you are ready to start a family.

And so these are the things that I want you to consider now. Because it’s going to be the true mental four-year first opportunity. It’s going to be crucial. And also detrimental, if you don’t start on the right foot. Because if you start with a career that you’re like, yes, I’m going to travel 80% of the time. But, you know, in the back of your mind, That you [00:07:00] have a family and that they’re your priority and that your spouse has taken the lead in their career or that your spouse is also traveling.

Who’s going to take care of the children, right? Because sometimes we think that, oh, once we get to the military, everything else will come easy. The careers are going to be easy. And that’s not always true. Why? Because our priorities don’t change. I mean, a little, right. I mean, for the most part, we have to show up and be at certain Training events, certain things that we have to get done in the military.

It’s something that we already signed off on. It’s a commitment that we have. But in civil and sectors, a little different, you’re not obligated to short term meeting. You’re not obligated to show up to an event. If you are not able to. At the end of the day, it’s not like the military where you have to be here at formation or you can’t miss movement because then, you’re considered AWOL all of that to say, You want to be able to have an understanding for yourself and with your family.

, a husband. Or with kids, or maybe you’re a single mother, right. Like understanding [00:08:00] exactly how you’re going to prioritize, how you’re going to align. Your values and your interest with this new career. Because here’s the thing that we don’t do.

And I see a lot of us women do this. We neglect our passions. We’re like, oh no, we’re not going to do podcasting because we have X, Y, and Z. There’s nothing wrong with having X, Y, and Z, and for you to actually take some time off and take a moment to consider if this is a part of your priority. But I have experience is that a lot of women kind of just stop what they’re doing or stop with their passions, others podcasting, maybe it’s a sport. Maybe it’s a community that they’ve been a part of. They stop it completely because of this new career or because they have no idea what they’re going to do with a career.

And now they’re feeling stuck and now they’re like, I have to take care of my family. I have to do this. I have to do that. But then they forget about their passions. And again, I’m not saying to put your passions over your family, that’s not what I’m saying at all, because I get it. [00:09:00] Family comes first. Your relationships come first.

But having an open mind because it could lead into job dissatisfaction. It could lead into dissatisfaction in your life in general. And so when you can begin now, Let’s say you’re in the transition or you’re ready to transition.

And you’re like, Hey, I still don’t know what exactly I’m going to pursue or where to begin. I want you to begin here. What are your passions? What are your interests and how are you incorporating these interests in these values? These passions into your new career. Are you then now focused? Okay. I can only look at work from home because my husband is traveling. Or I’m only looking at hybrid because I know myself, I need some time outside of this house. And I also need some flexibility. To help me with my children to start a family, to be able to go out and date. Whatever it is for you. Or be able to have time to go play my sport, [00:10:00] whatever it means for you.

I want you to begin there. I want you to stop neglecting, stop neglecting your personal interests and your passions. Because of this career. I don’t want you to just take any first child that is out there. And call it a career because he used to do this in the military. I want to invite you to focus on how this passion. Really plays a role within your new career and how you’re going to use that. To help you get in your next career. Because if you don’t, it’s going to lead to job dissatisfaction career dissatisfaction. And you’re going to be back at square one. Focusing on finding something different, thinking that that’s, what’s going to help you.

But in reality is you getting to the root of it. You get into the bottom of exactly what you are interested in and what you’re going to pursue. And it also is hard for those of you that are moms. Trust me, I get it. I wanted to put myself at the very bottom and I’m like, I’m just going to do whatever works for the [00:11:00] family. But if you’re honest with yourself and you have these conversations with the family, the family is going to support you. The family is going to say, Hey, This is what we can do.

This is where I can ship in. This is exactly where, we can get support and that’s the biggest piece here because you want to be able to provide a work-life balance as much as possible. And that plays a huge role too, in looking for a career with a company., are they open to the work-life balance?

Do they provide your resources? Do they provide you tools? Do they provide you with, time that it’s going to allow you to do what you need to do outside of the working hours? Because that’s a huge piece. The last thing you want to do is be another statistic. Leave the company before two years, and now you’re again doing this all over. Unhappy insecure more.

Self-doubt creeping in and on top of that, now you continue to have your family that is maybe depending on you, or maybe depending on you to actually decide on what is best for the entire family. What’s best for [00:12:00] you in the family. So I want to invite you today, regardless of where you are. Maybe you’re already in the career.

Maybe you’re in a new career. Maybe you’re still in the military. I want you to start considering. What are your personal interests and your values? So that you can start aligning them for your career outside of the military. All right. That’s all that I have for you today. I hope that this is helpful and listen, come connect with me on LinkedIn so that you can not only subscribe to the newsletter because we’re over 1000 subscribers, but also to come join me on our, my monthly events.

All right. Look forward to seeing you soon. Take care.